Words Make Great Gifts! I wish I had been the author of this wonderful romp with words! But, ‘twasn’t me, ‘twas the copywriter Robert Pirosh.* I offer them to you as a literary holiday treat!

Dear Sir:

I like words. I like fat buttery words, such as ooze, turpitude, glutinous, toady. I like solemn, angular, creaky words, such as straitlaced, cantankerous, pecunious, valedictory. I like spurious, black-is-white words, such as mortician, liquidate, tonsorial, demi-monde. I like suave "V" words, such as Svengali, svelte, bravura, verve. I like crunchy, brittle, crackly words, such as splinter, grapple, jostle, crusty. I like sullen, crabbed, scowling words, such as skulk, glower, scabby, churl. I like Oh-Heavens, my-gracious, land's-sake words, such as tricksy, tucker, genteel, horrid. I like elegant, flowery words, such as estivate, peregrinate, elysium, halcyon. I like wormy, squirmy, mealy words, such as crawl, blubber, squeal, drip. I like sniggly, chuckling words, such as cowlick, gurgle, bubble and burp.

*This is an excerpt from a letter copywriter Robert Pirosh wrote and sent to all the directors, producers, and studio executives he could think of.  He had just landed in Hollywood; it was 1934, and he was eager to become a screenwriter. His approach worked, and after securing three interviews he took a job as a junior writer with MGM.Pirosh went on to write for the Marx Brothers, and in 1949 won an Academy Award for his Battleground script.

Some of the best holiday gifts we can give are the words of love and appreciation we share with one another, in cards, in person, in poems.  They’re free, you don’t have to stand in line to get them, and no one ever needs to return them because they always fit perfectly!